Stop worrying about what other people think of you

Most of us worry so much what people think, it is to the point that it is a type of anxiety in itself. These fears are misguided according to studies. People spend far less time passing judgement on us than we assume. When they do think of us, we overestimate how negative their perceptions are. We worry about what other people think of us because of the need to fit in and connect. It is one of the six basic needs. This is a need that can lead to approval anxiety. Your happiness and fulfillment is ultimately placed in the hands of other people. For those who struggle with anxiety, it is a nightmare. We are often expected to conform to certain norms from when we are young. Relating to being liked and accepted are included in these. The feeling that you have to be a certain way to be liked is easy to get caught up in. Our own inner critic can be heavily linked to what we imagine others will think of us. This is that little voice in your head that tells us negative things. Negative things about what you must seem to other people. There's no actual evidence to back this up, most of the time. If you challenge your inner critic, this is something you will find out. This is no great surprise if we expect others to judge us if we judge ourselves. You will care less about needing external validation if you start to know your values and what is important to you. Just as you do not like everyone you meet, not everyone will like you. No matter how hard you try or how good your intentions towards them may be, you can not control the way other people react to you. We all know people who are happy to bring others down. Try looking at it as a sign of how accepting they are of themselves, not being a reflection of how accepting they are of you. You can have a lot of freedom to focus your attention elsewhere when accepting the fact you have no control over how people think of you. The idea will be broken that if if you conform to certain ideas, you will automatically come across well to other people. You can be held back and stopped from making changes in your life worrying about how other people may react to you. A big step towards limiting the importance you attach to having other people validate you is to learn to accept yourself and recognize your self-worth. Being comfortable with who you are and knowing that you're enough is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Remember, it will not happen overnight. Since you have worried about what other people think of you for so long, learning how to stop can be difficult. Taken for an article by Chloe Brotheridge titled A Calmer You.